About last night
May. 14th, 2024 04:19 pmit feels so good to be understood and be appreciated for my knowledge and ideas
like i actually just listen to myself and oh my god i know something, its crazy. im crazy
all this self scrutiny and mess and pain was for something???
its so great
and oh my god
im a bit nervous about maybe liking someone a bit, i think, i dont know if i just really want to be friends, im not sure. but i feel understood and i cant ask for anything more, it gives me a thril. its been a while since ive communicated like that.
i do feel a bit giddy, im trying to calm down to sleep.
i love it i love it.
i hope i get the courage up to share my ideas, because if things take off wiht them, to share something like that and be understood, could really be something. i just want to talk and talk and connect forever, its so lonely being in a brain
being in a brain
going about daily things, but to connect? i never want to lose it.
im definitely more excited about one person. and its making me nervous.
but im funny and creatively smart and its shared when someone appreciates me and we connect and we talk and ohhhhhhh i love it i love it
the understated confidence the security and just knowing. cleverness. ive missed that. or feeling the cleverness on a certain level. and people appreciating my humour and participating ohhhhh my god. i love it i love them
so georgous. all the time just fluent in it you god.
the calm and sure.
so goood
i love it i love it
its probably just because of the fact i havent felt understood like that and been able to share like that with people for a while but this person oh my god oh my god. liking people is embarrasing though. i dont like it. hopefully i'll be able to hide it until it fades.
i hate people who are interested in me usually so i cant bear the thought of me liking someone, it feels gross and not right and it makes me feel awful. and i act less rationally i think so i hopw to never act in a strange way again. but i guess im enjoying this feeling for now, gotta remember, satisfaction in wanting satisfaction in wanting. no good getting overly upset about the wanting. i'll try to enjoy the feeling a bit without feeling too bad. if it is what i think it is.
its too long till i next see them, too long. thats the thing the wanting. ive got to be satisfied, calm. accept, accept.
work on my ideas, stay calm, accept.
i want to talk i want to talk i want to have a sleepover and do childish things and do whatever with people i want it i want. its hard to stay calm when the craving has been for so longgg. so long.
so finally something satisfied, satisfied to stoke the fire
ive been beating myself up for so long, about not being smart. and to feel a little bit smart and funny outside of some environment is liquid gold to me.
i hope i dont become dumb by calling myself smart, is it too cocky? i think ive got enough doubt and self critisism for now, lets see if that changes.
like i actually just listen to myself and oh my god i know something, its crazy. im crazy
all this self scrutiny and mess and pain was for something???
its so great
and oh my god
im a bit nervous about maybe liking someone a bit, i think, i dont know if i just really want to be friends, im not sure. but i feel understood and i cant ask for anything more, it gives me a thril. its been a while since ive communicated like that.
i do feel a bit giddy, im trying to calm down to sleep.
i love it i love it.
i hope i get the courage up to share my ideas, because if things take off wiht them, to share something like that and be understood, could really be something. i just want to talk and talk and connect forever, its so lonely being in a brain
being in a brain
going about daily things, but to connect? i never want to lose it.
im definitely more excited about one person. and its making me nervous.
but im funny and creatively smart and its shared when someone appreciates me and we connect and we talk and ohhhhhhh i love it i love it
the understated confidence the security and just knowing. cleverness. ive missed that. or feeling the cleverness on a certain level. and people appreciating my humour and participating ohhhhh my god. i love it i love them
so georgous. all the time just fluent in it you god.
the calm and sure.
so goood
i love it i love it
its probably just because of the fact i havent felt understood like that and been able to share like that with people for a while but this person oh my god oh my god. liking people is embarrasing though. i dont like it. hopefully i'll be able to hide it until it fades.
i hate people who are interested in me usually so i cant bear the thought of me liking someone, it feels gross and not right and it makes me feel awful. and i act less rationally i think so i hopw to never act in a strange way again. but i guess im enjoying this feeling for now, gotta remember, satisfaction in wanting satisfaction in wanting. no good getting overly upset about the wanting. i'll try to enjoy the feeling a bit without feeling too bad. if it is what i think it is.
its too long till i next see them, too long. thats the thing the wanting. ive got to be satisfied, calm. accept, accept.
work on my ideas, stay calm, accept.
i want to talk i want to talk i want to have a sleepover and do childish things and do whatever with people i want it i want. its hard to stay calm when the craving has been for so longgg. so long.
so finally something satisfied, satisfied to stoke the fire
ive been beating myself up for so long, about not being smart. and to feel a little bit smart and funny outside of some environment is liquid gold to me.
i hope i dont become dumb by calling myself smart, is it too cocky? i think ive got enough doubt and self critisism for now, lets see if that changes.